Thursday, April 16, 2015

Effective Starseed Counselor

Hey there High Vibe Humans,
Breezy Here!

Below is a list of characteristics I believe will lead to being an EFFECTIVE Starseed Counselor.

 Starseeds have many different missions while incarnated on planet Earth. Therefore, I am speaking specifically to those who feel their mission is to heal others, and provide counsel. I wanted to post about this because there are a lot of starseeds who end up being healers of some kind in their communities yet do not understand fully what this means. Often times, we find people coming to us with problems, wanting to talk about their stress, and ask for advice. This can be overwhelming. It also puts us in a powerful position.
We are dealing with people's LIVES!
What we say matters to them, and can create ripples that might turn into unforeseen waves. That is why I believe it is important that we teach other the proper skills and characteristics to be more effective.
 I have also created a video to go along with this article.
How to Be an Effective Starseed Counselor <<Link
This is part one.
Characteristics that contribute to being an effective counselor are:

 1. Possess an Identity as a "Counselor/healer"

In order to understand if you see yourself as a counselor, ask your self the following questions...

  • Do I see myself helping the human race with emotional, mental, and spiritual issues?
  • Am I innately motivated to heal MY SELF so that I can better serve & heal others?
  • Do I see myself advocating for the rights of marginalized individuals?
    • This includes the willingness to understand another's struggle
    • Understanding how being of a different sexual orientation, class, ethnicity/race, and gender might affect their daily lives.
  • Am I willing to take on this label and offer my services with compassion?

2. Become Deeply involved in the Work and Derive Meaning

  • Becoming deeply involved means that this is a passion that is allowed to consume your life. There is an understanding that being a counselor is not separate from life, it is LIFE. There is no '9 to 5' format. This is because there is always more to learn. Continuing education into history, culture, art, healing practices, and spiritual concepts can not only enhance your knowledge but at some point may prove useful in helping someone else. Learning more about life will better help the people who come to see you.  After all, one cannot counsel a Native American without knowing about their culture and the history that their ancestors have endured, and how that might still be effecting them today. Everything that is done, every action that is taken is done with the purpose of helping someone else out later down the road.
  • Derive meaning from working as a counselor/healer means to find meaning within one's own BE-ingness. In learning about other individuals, it is important to understand one's self. 
    • What is your motivation?
    • What does it mean to be a healer?
    • Does it come with a sense of purpose?
    • Even if you feel you have failed, can you still see worth in your work?
There is no down time. One is either working on oneself, and healing the past and other aspects of self. OR one is helping another person to heal and work on aspects of themselves. Counselor/healers understand the effect society can have on the soul, and continue to advocate for a better society. Therefore, one is always healing, always advocating, and never stops learning.

3. Empathetic Abilities & Personal Warmth

  • Empathy is not the same as sympathy. Empathy asks you to put yourself into the experience of another person. It asks you to "walk in their shoes" and truly try to understand where that person is coming from. Not to sympathize with their dilemma, but BE in their life world. Look at the world from their point of view and experience those events and life choices as if they were your own. THEN move from that space to gain a deeper understanding of the issue.
    • It is not an easy task, and takes a genuine & compassionate person. It also takes a bit of practice.
  • Personal warmth asks for an air openness and genuine caring. This quality creates a safe and welcoming environment. Personal warmth is often times a key ingredient for soul healing. It allows the individual to truly feel welcome and understood. The safe environment tells the person that is okay to open up because there is a feeling that they will be accepted and not judged. 
    • In my opinion, personal warmth is key for healing.

4. Possess Effective Interpersonal Skills

  • Interpersonal skills refers to the ability to communicate and interact with others. It's kind of a "no brainer". Perfecting these communication skills will enhance your role as a counselor/healer because the main part of this role is talking to people about their problems. 
    • A simple Google search: Interpersonal Skills, can pull up a whole list of "SKILLS YOU NEED" and "10 MUST HAVES" type articles. 

5. Have a Sense of Humor

  • The American Counseling Association (ACA) has a great article on this: Humor in Counseling
    • This is a great read, with a bit more detail.
  • In essence, counseling and healing is serious and depressing work. It can be an emotional roller coaster dealing with other people's "skeletons in the closet". Without a positive disposition/out look, it could drive you crazy. Especially when dealing with 'crazy' people.
  • There will be aggressive, overly offensive people. Some people may even act that way in order to get a rise out of you. It WILL be emotionally exhausting if you take everything that is said seriously and personally. Instead, having the ability to laugh it off, and laugh at yourself can go a long way in alleviating the pressure.
    • No one wants a counselor who can't take a joke. Or tell one!
That's it for characteristics that make an effective counselor. The next article will give clues to the building blocks of an effective Starseed Counselor/healer.

PART 2: Starseed Counselor/Healer Building Blocks

This list is based off of a compiled list from Collins 2007; Corey 2009; & Parrot 2003

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